Alan Coren - Bond Tensed in the Darkness and Reached for his Teeth

James Bond as a pensioner. A short story by Alan Coren presents a snapshot of life in Bond's autumn years.

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With all the coverage of Jeffrey Deaver's new James Bond novel, Carte Blanche, I'm reminded of one of the most original takes on the James Bond character. Alan Coren's parodic short story Dr No Will See You Now considers an aged Bond coping with the vicissitudes of old age with steely determination. Lovely Bond touch to have Bond's denture fixative made by "Chas Fillibee of Albemarle Street, the world's premier fixative man."

The story is included in an anthology of Coren's writing from the 60s to the 2000s called The Essential Alan Coren - Chocolate and Cuckoo Clocks.