If I were to make a resolution this year, it would be to work at getting operatives on the ground in each of the Five Eyes nations. Presently, we have dear Bertie working tirelessly out of Melbourne, often putting his life at risk, to bring us top quality gen in his Letter from Melbourne.
We need assets in the US, New Zealand and Canada, with clean comms, that can provide similar intelligence. Do you have what it takes? If so, get in touch with Mrs T. and we'll put you through clearance.
Bertie managed to smuggle out an invigorating suggestion for the New Year. Aesop has been one of his surveillance targets for some time. It was established in Melbourne, Australia, in 1987 to create a range of grooming products.
He heartily recommends the Violet Leaf Hair Balm (top), a creamy concoction of natural butters and oils that bring order and softness to an otherwise wayward and troubled mane.
Aesop is now available from reputable UK outlets, including Caro at dear old Bruton a few miles out from Tweed Towers.
Whispers: Strictly entre nous — as it's a somewhat discomfiting subject — Bertie would also like to draw your attention to Aesop's Post-Poo Drops, an 'aromatic botanical bathroom deodoriser to combat the malodorous'. Drop in the loo and your fragrant reputation remains in tact.